The Dairy Queen
First, I'm sorry I haven't posted on The Bach. I have a mental block against it - I have something like four episodes to watch, and it seems like it requires an overwhelming amount of time. I've been trying to avoid any news about the final outcome - but I'm fairly certain I know the deal. I promise to have my thoughts posted soon.
In the meantime, I have some thoughts on another topic. I'm confident this is too much information to be sharing in a public forum, but that has not stopped me before, so here I go again...
As I mentioned in an earlier post, one of my sole past times these days is feeding the ravenous little child now living in my home. He eats constantly. Naturally, I'm trying to fulfill the essential requirement for my emancipation: a freezer full of breast milk. Enter my new best friend/worst enemy: the Medela Pump In Style.
Immediately after my first interaction with this awe inspiring contraption, I had two thoughts:
1. There is absolutely nothing stylish about any part of this "In Style" experience.
2. This machine was most definitely invented by a man.
After milking myself a few more times, I was compelled to explore the roots of this C-R-A-Z-Y device. It didn't take long to find the information I was looking for, and my suspicions were confirmed. I kid you not, the breast pump was invented by Edward Lasker: a man who lived to be 95 years old yet was only married once for a few months before his wife died of a "surgeon's error." He never had kids. He made his living as a mechanical and electrical engineer. Perfect. I'm quite sure if I spent more time I would discover that he had an unusually close relationship with his overbearing mother and later in life was known to display misogynistic tendencies whenever he was not locked in his dungeon-like basement.
If you saw this machine, you would believe as I do, that no innovations have been realized since Lasker's original 1927 model.
2 comments:
omg, this is hilarious. I have spent more time with the Medela Pump-In-Style than I care to remember (18 months with baby # 1 for starters) and never knew who the inventor was. Nice! Here are a few more fun facts for the archives:
-- airport security goes nuts with that thing (a briefcase you can't open with lots of tubes and dials...did someone say bomb?)
-- the best way through a security check-point is to use the word 'breast' audiblly and often. It makes them want to rush you right on out of there.
-- I had a freezer full of 8-oz bags when the great black-out of '03 descended on us. Different areas of the city were affected differently, but we were without power for three days. I lost all of it. Somehow my rage attached not to Con Ed but to Medela. I never forgave them.
Ali - your comment sent a chill down my spine. I am researching generators. I owe you a call - talk soon. xxoo
Post a Comment