Monday, July 9, 2007

Hey, trainwreck


I couldn't stand the thought of going out in the heat on Sunday, so I spent a large part of the day doing paperwork for my upcoming charity tournament in front of the TV. One of the ridiculous things I watched: an HOUR AND A HALF of "Hey, Paula". This show is documenting the trainwreck that is Paula Abdul, and it is pure, vapid entertainment. Perfect summertime drivel.

Mindless pursuit aside, I have to acknowledge the show may have held my attention due to some recent personal experiences. It turns out, I can relate to Paula on an unexpected level. I have been acutely aware and increasingly amused by the fact that some of the strangers I interact with nowadays think I'm drunk. I am not being facetious.

I am fueling this perception with two behaviors:
  1. I don't always answer questions appropriately. "Miss, what size would you like?" "Yes, please." "Would you like to hear our specials?" "I'm fine, thank you. How are you?" After a few missteps, the clerk/waiter/salesgirl suspects I have a mental problem.

  2. After laying the groundwork for the insanity defense, I then turn to walk away from the counter, table, etc., and inevitably the wobble kicks in. A barely perceptible stumble that would go unnoticed if red flags had not already been raised.
I can see it in their faces. A mix of sympathy and amusement. Schadenfreude, perhaps. They're thinking, "This poor girl has been hitting the bottle and it's only 9:15 in the morning. It is going to take more than a grande latte to get her to quitting time."

Paula has found similar accusations hurtful. I find it amusing. Maybe I can do a reality show and Bravo can pay me a million dollars to follow me around for a couple of weeks?

In case you missed it, here's a link to Paula's promotional interview for this season's Idol. Trainwreck.


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Joan, there was an article in today's NY Times which you probably already saw about boomers & hearing loss. One paragraph caught my eye:

"But some, like Oticon’s Epoq, come with other benefits, and not just for those who strain to hear the waiter recite the specials. The Epoq, which was introduced in May, is the first hearing aid to have integrated wireless and Bluetooth connectivity, so it can stream a cellphone call or music and audio from a radio, computer or MP3 into the ears through a remote control-like device worn on the body. It is, in other words, a wireless hands-free headset."

JAV said...

Helen - Thanks! I hadn't seen the article yet, but will check it out. I'm sure this is the same technology that the bone anchored one I would use would employ. Cool, huh?